Jon Jenkins’ One Steining Moment: Homecoming 2013

It all started like any other Homecoming weekend.  Up early grabbing the groceries.  Setting up of our ever-growing tailgating compound.  Early morning imbibing while the wives hit up the craft fair.  Covert drinking during the first half of the football game (in direct violation of the 2013 Maine Football Tailgating Guidelines). Then things took a strange twist.

After some additional, legal consumption of adult beverages at half-time, I headed over to the field house to find my wife and son.  Before I could get to the doors I was overrun by the UMaine football team heading back to the field, up 24-7 going into the second half.

Before I knew it I was standing on the sidelines surrounded by all the players.  While the game continued I started talking to the guys.  I was saying how part of me always regretted never playing football in high school and wondering if I would have been any good.  Maine continued to play well in the second half, maintaining their lead all the way to the end of fourth quarter.  The win was all but guaranteed.  Apparently, the team captain heard about what I had been saying.  He approached me and asked me if I wanted to suit up and go in for a play.  I thought he had to be kidding, but he insisted he was completely serious, saying that no one should ever have to live wondering what could have been.  He went over to Coach Cosgrove, but Cosgrove told him no way.  At that point, the entire rest of the team, and then the fans, started chanting “Jenkins! Jenkins!”  After what seemed like an eternity, Coach Cosgrove relented (if for no other reason than to get on with the game) and told me to suit up.

With only 18 seconds left in the game, they put me on the field as a defensive end.  It was 4th and 5 and William & Mary had the ball at their own 45 yard line.  Unless they pulled off a miracle, this would be the last play of the game.  Before heading out onto the field the coach said to me “after the snap just go run into someone and don’t kill yourself.”  My heart was racing, my adrenaline surging.  Before I could even start to think about what the hell I was doing, the ball was snapped.  I leaped forward towards the lineman.  Sensing he was going for the pass block, I looked towards the quarterback.  I saw a clear path.  I started pumping my legs with everything I had to give.  Not even realizing what was going on I found myself dodging the offence, focused squarely on my target.  Before I knew it I was within arm’s reach of the quarterback.  I dropped my shoulder, shut my eyes and held my breath.  When I finally opened my eyes I found myself laying on the ground.  Next to me was William & Mary’s quarterback, ball still in hand.  Then I hit me, I just sacked the quarterback.  The entire stadium erupted with cheers.  The team pulled me up off the field and hoisted me into the air.  It was an unbeliev…
[Aside]
What…
None of that actually happened…
That’s the plot of the movie Rudy…
I was at work in San Diego all weekend…
THERE WAS NO CRAFT FAIR!…
Well, that’s a little embarrassing.  I guess there’s always next year.  On the bright side, I did get to sleep in and eat the hotel breakfast before I had to go to work for 12 hours each day, so that’s a shining moment in my book (two if you count Saturday AND Sunday).

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